Who does this sort of thing?

You’ll remember that about three weeks ago I was subjected to a full-on tirade by someone whom I had intended to question in a sensitive, conciliatory way about their treatment of my child. I was really upset and angry at both the injustice and how I’d been treated so I tweeted my feelings in one word. This tweet was picked up by a Twitter friend and, in an exchange of about 5 tweets, no names were mentioned.

The situation was later resolved and no more has been said about it. I gather that procedures and systems will change. I’m still not happy but you can’t always get what you want. I’d shrugged it all off.

However, this morning I had to endure being called to account by that person’s boss, whom I deeply admire and respect, and who has been nothing but professional in their dealings with me. I have had to apologise for the situation into which they have been dragged.

What happened?

Someone followed me, or was already a follower then went through my Twitter timeline to dig out that exchange. Without knowing ANY of the details – I haven’t talked about the conversation at all other than to say that I was really upset – they then reported it back to the person concerned, who has now escalated it up the organisation. I am being as oblique in this paragraph as I was in the tweet. I vented with one tweet; was then drawn out in another but still mentioned no names.

I can understand how angry he feels, but I didn’t mention any names and only about four people could have seen that tweet and deduced who he was. It wasn’t threatening, it wasn’t racist or sexist or any of those things or actionable in any way.

What sort of person would go and stir up trouble in that way?

If your friend X says something nasty about Y, why would you feel obliged to report that back to Y and cause more trouble for X? You don’t know the situation, all you are doing is making the situation worse for everyone. Including yourself, though if you’re the sort of person who would do this, you’re probably to thick to understand or too spiteful to care. And so much the worse for digging out weeks-old tweets. Why on earth would anyone do that?

The thing is, I have a pretty good idea who it was. I’m not 100% certain so I can’t take any action and they will get away with their spiteful behaviour, but if they’ve treated me like this, I can’t be expected to work with them again. I wonder who hates me so much that they’d do this to me, and I only wish I knew what I’d done to deserve this. I sort of wish I’d done something.

I’ve already had someone on Twitter suggesting I take the person concerned out for a coffee to apologise. Seriously. And now I’ve got to explain all of this to the OH and the family, who will give me THAT naughty child look and tell me all the things I know I shouldn’t do on social media. “I told you to be careful.” “Well, it’s Twitter, isn’t it?”

So I am about to write to the organisation and apologise. I am not waiting around for an apology from the person who prompted this undoubted outburst, which I knew at the time was misguided and which I regret – a bit – nor from the spiteful, vindictive person, and remember I’ve a good idea who you are, honey, who stirred up all this trouble. I hope they are now examining their conscience, if they have one.