I am Oscar.

I am a dog. With four big paws and a tail that wags. And ears and a great big nosey.

I have a mum and a dad and two puppies. They are humans. There is another dog. He is little and lives here with me too. I love my dad best and my mum and the puppies too. I don’t really love the other dog.

My humans call me Wudgie or LuLu sometimes and sometimes they call me Raffles. They call me other names too but I don’t understand them.

The other one was not always here. I have to share my mum and dad and puppies with him and he goes in my bed so I can’t go in there. Sometimes I go in there, though. I don’t like sharing all my things with him but he won’t go away. He isn’t too bad, though, and I’m never alone now because he is always here.

The other one tries to play with me sometimes and he shows me who’s boss a lot and I don’t like that really but sometimes I play with him too. I don’t like him much, especially when people try to cuddle him. They are my cuddles.

I am a Goodboy and I am Lovely. I kiss people with my tongue to show them how lovely I am and how lovely they are. Some people like it when I kiss them. Some people don’t like it and growl or bark at me. They don’t think I am lovely but I still like them. Some people like it sometimes and at other times they don’t like it. It is confusing.

When my people come home I wag a lot and dance about, especially if it’s dad because he goes away for a long time. Sometimes he’s away at bedtime and when I wake up he’s still away and that makes me sad.

The sofa is not for me. I climb up there and sometimes the humans let me stay but sometimes they push me away and I lie down on the floor near their feet. I am a Goodboy. They never push the other one away. The sofa is for him but not for me. That makes me sad. We are not allowed upstairs but sometimes I go upstairs. I have never been OnTheBed but Raffles, the other one, has. I think that is naughty.

I like my food, especially chicken. I like the humans’  food too, especially chips and toast. Sometimes my mum makes me toast with butter on it and I wag my tail a lot. I love chips. Sometimes my mum leaves nice stuff to eat out in the kitchen but I am a Goodboy and I don’t take it. I did take some lovely meat once and my mum told me off a lot. Did I say that I love chips?

I like going for walkies with my people and I like meeting my friends at school but I think school is a bit boring but I can be on my own with my mum. My mum takes biscuits for me at school sometimes so that makes it better. I don’t like being in the car much but I know that there are walkies when I get out of the car. I always stay with my mum on walkies especially when the other one goes off because I am a Goodboy. Sometimes I run away from the car after walkies because I don’t want to go home and my mum gets cross. I like paddling but I don’t like swimming. I am a bit scared of swimming but I did it once when the Big Puppy swam with me in the river and held my lead so I felt safe.

I do Goback at school but when I’m on walkies I don’t like bringing things back to my people. I like to chew the things my people give me and then they aren’t there anymore. I am not allowed to have toys. Other dogs are allowed to have toys, ducks and teddies and things, but I’m not. Except my teddy and my antler and I chew them sometimes. And my blanket.

I like going in my garden too. In and out. In and out. But I’m usually in now because there are people in my house and I can’t go through the kitchen door anymore. I can’t see the garden and the people in my house are making a lot of noise and there are lots of nasty smells. I wish they would go away.

We go out into my garden after breakfast and before bedtime and sometimes in the middle of the day. The people doing stuff in my garden are nice to me but I don’t get to see them much. I only hear them and I woof to say hello to them when they come to my house. I hope they can hear me.

I can only be in this room here and sometimes I go into the room that wasn’t the kitchen but is now. I stand on the platform thing and the human there gives me a cuddle and talks to me. I love cuddles and talking but I don’t have them when my humans aren’t here. I am sad when they aren’t here.

When my humans are sad sometimes they cry I lick their tears and put my paw on them because I am a Goodboy and I don’t want them to be sad. I always want to be with my humans and look after them but a lot of the time they are staring into little metal boxes. I kiss them a lot and remind them that I’m still here and sometimes I put my paw on the boxes but then they yell at me to go away and that makes me sad.

My family does singing with blowy things or sometimes just singing and I sing along too. I  like that music the Puppy plays on her stick thing, they call it Mozart, and I like my mum singing those screechy notes like birds and cats. If I don’t like the music, I don’t sing. I don’t like cats or those big birds called pigeons. They should get out of my garden and I tell them that.

I love puppies but sometimes they are afraid of me and I am confused. Why would a puppy be afraid of me? I will not run away with their ice cream or their biscuit. I am a Goodboy.

I want to go in my garden again but I’m stuck here in this room with the other one and he’s in my bed again. Why can’t he go into his own bed? It looks comfy in there. I wonder if we will have chips tonight.

That’s all about me. If you want to ask me a question, I will try and answer it but I only understand English and hand signals, OK?